


My Love, Take Your Time

by Chimney_on_the_roof



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Angst, Character Death, F/M, References to Illness, Sad, inspired by a dream, set in the late twentieth century
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:20:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24393421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chimney_on_the_roof/pseuds/Chimney_on_the_roof
Summary: “I’ll be back before you know I’m gone,” he said and he gave her a reassuring smile, before walking over to the taxi. Peggy watched as he stepped into the car and was taken to the train station. She sighed and closed her eyes, ignoring the lingering pain in her stomach. Alexander’s sudden decisions always surprised her, and more often than not he forgot to tell those around him about his decisions.
Relationships: Alexander Hamilton/Elizabeth "Eliza" Schuyler
Comments: 6
Kudos: 19





	My Love, Take Your Time

**Author's Note:**

> (This fic is set in the late twentieth century)

Peggy watched the children in the street play before they had to go to school. She enjoyed hearing their happy cheers. It was warm already, but not yet too warm to sit outside. The typical July weather restricted her to stay inside where there were fans, because it would get too hot for her to be outside as the day progressed. The low rumbling of an engine came closer and the front door next to Peggy opened. She leaned her head back into the cushions of the rocking chair and turned her head towards Alexander, who hurriedly stepped through the door with a small case. “Where are you going?” Peggy asked him.

He turned to her in surprise, but quickly recovered. “There’s an old friend visiting the state. A taxi is coming to take me to the station.” He looked at the street and a taxi rounded the corner. “There it is.”

“When are you coming home? You must be gone for a while if you’re taking the train,” Peggy said with a sharp tone. “Call us before you board the train back home.”

Alexander looked her directly in the eye. The taxi stopped in front of the house. “I’ll be back before you know I’m gone,” he said and he gave her a reassuring smile, before walking over to the taxi. Peggy watched as he stepped into the car and was taken to the train station. She sighed and closed her eyes, ignoring the lingering pain in her stomach. Alexander’s sudden decisions always surprised her, and more often than not he forgot to tell those around him about his decisions.

-

When Eliza came home, Peggy had moved herself to the large couch in Eliza and Alexander’s living room. She was staying at their house because of her illness, and Alexander was kind enough to offer her a place to stay. She had no doubt it had to do with the fact that she was Eliza’s sister.

“Where’s Alexander?” Eliza asked from the doorway, waking Peggy from her drowsy state. Peggy blinked and looked at the clock. It had gotten late, and she hadn’t noticed. Maybe Alexander had already called.

“He said he’s visiting an old friend in the state,” she replied. “He left this morning.”

Eliza frowned and crossed her arms. “Without telling me…”

Peggy took a closer look at her sister. “He seemed quite hurried. I think it was another one of his last-minute decisions. Maybe he had to hurry in order to not miss the train…” she mused.

Her sister raised her eyebrows and scoffed. “The train? Did he say where he was going?”

Peggy shook her head apologetically. “But I asked him to call before returning home.” Eliza shrugged and left the room to prepare dinner in the kitchen, leaving Peggy with an uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach.

-

Peggy was cleaning the dishes when the phone rang. She breathed a sigh of relief, assuming it was Alexander. Eliza sprinted to the phone.

“Why didn’t you say you were going?” Eliza asked when she heard Alexander’s soft “Hi.” She listened as Alexander confirmed her sister’s guess that it was a last-minute decision. His tone didn’t match his words, she noticed. He didn’t sound apologetic or angry. His tone was emotionless. In order to not have to listen to that unsettling tone any longer, she said, “Alexander. Please just come back home. We’ll talk about it later.”

Alexander was silent for a moment before he said, “I’ll see you on the other side.”

“Come home, Alexander…”

Eliza moved the phone from her ear to end the call, but before she could put it on the hook, she heard Alexander say with urgency and more emotion, “Hey.” She held the phone to her ear again. “Best of wives and best of women…” Eliza held her breath, but the next thing she heard were the familiar slow beeps indicating that Alexander had hung up.

-

Alexander’s words echoed through her head as she waited with Peggy on the couch for him to return. She knew she couldn’t sleep without Alexander by her side, and Peggy’s health seemed to be declining slowly. She hadn’t mentioned it, but Eliza saw her wince and grab her stomach and she wasn’t as cheerful as usual. It was understandable, seeing as Peggy had to spend her days indoors without company. Peggy fell asleep with her sister’s arm protectively around her.

Eliza wondered what woke her up. She was startled awake after she had dreamed about Alexander, but she couldn’t remember exactly what the dream had been about. She remembered him standing far away with his eyes on her. “I’ll see you on the other side,” he said before she woke up. Alexander had said the same words on the phone, but when he said them in her dream they sounded different. Sad, regretful.

Next to her, Peggy was still asleep. The sun cast a greyish blue light into the room due to the blue curtains. It was almost half past five, Eliza discovered after a glance at the clock. She wondered if Alexander had come home, that that was the reason she had woken up. She listened intently for some sign of his presence, but all she heard were the birds outside and a car in the distance. Peggy’s deep breaths made the room feel at peace, but she couldn’t shake off an uneasy feeling. The house felt empty, almost cold, without Peggy’s lively personality and Alexander’s endless talking.

In her overthinking she must have woken up Peggy, because her sleepy voice interrupted Eliza’s thoughts. “Is Alexander home?”

“I don’t think so.”

Peggy sat up straight and looked at her sister, who looked back. They were both thinking the same thing, Alexander should’ve been home by now.

-

Both sisters were unable to fall asleep anymore, so they were half watching TV when around eight o’clock the phone rang. They looked at each other with wide eyes and then Peggy got up to take the call. Eliza examined her sister’s expression as she answered the phone. “Margarita Schuyler,” she said into the phone. Eliza’s heart skipped a beat when Peggy squinted her eyes and faced away from Eliza.

“Yes, that’s me…” Peggy looked back at Eliza with her eyebrows knitted together. “It’s a doctor,” she told her with a quiver in her voice. She looked pale. Peggy listened as the doctor continued talking, then she put the phone on the hook with trembling hands. Eliza was frozen to the spot when Peggy raced to the bathroom. Her heart seemed to have stopped and at the same time to be trying to break out through her rib cage.

-

When Peggy reached the bathroom, she sunk to the ground. She was afraid to tell Eliza, but she knew she would find out eventually. Distressed thoughts fought for a front seat in her mind. The tears in her eyes blurred her vision and she found her way to the toilet on hands and knees. When she couldn’t hold back the sobs anymore, she threw up into the toilet.

Eliza wasn’t sure whether to follow her sister to the bathroom or not. She was torn between comforting her and giving her some privacy. Whatever the doctor had told her wasn’t good news. What if Peggy wasn’t going to recover?

The ringing of the phone made its way to her ears. With a racing heart she looked at the phone, but stayed on the couch. What else did the doctor want to tell her? When the ringing stopped, she made her way to the phone, not really knowing why. It could have been Alexander, but it was too late now. The phone rang again and Eliza picked up.

“Hello?” she said with an unsteady voice.

“Elizabeth Hamilton?” a man’s voice asked.

“Yes…?” She recognised the voice, but couldn’t remember who it belonged to.

“If you come at once, you might catch your husband alive. He’s asking for you.”

Eliza felt the blood drain from her face and the world stopped spinning. “What’s going on?” she managed to ask with a pinched throat.

“Has your sister not told you?”

“No?...” She glanced at the door Peggy disappeared through.

The next words made her heart shatter. “Alexander has been shot.” After a brief silence, he added, “I am really sorry.”

The world started spinning again, but too fast for Eliza to keep up with. She stayed rooted on the spot while the world spun around her, talking to her, asking her to stay afloat. It dawned on her that the man had given her an address, and she asked him to repeat it so she could write it down. Then she ended the phone call.

-

Eliza drove herself and her sister to the address the man, William, a friend of Alexander’s, gave them. The drive was short and silent. William himself led them to his bedroom, where a handful of people were gathered. It felt too crowded. Eliza made her way to the bed on which Alexander lay. A doctor was by his side, but wasn’t doing anything. Alexander’s shirt was ripped open to reveal a wound above his hip. When she reached the bed, she sank to the ground to be on the same eye level as her husband, and because her legs gave out.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were going?” she asked with a controlled voice. To the others in the room she seemed calm, but was in reality not fully realising what was happening. Alexander gave her a frightened look. His blue eyes were teary but full of desperation.

“I didn’t want to worry you. I thought… I would come back before…” He winced and Eliza took his hands. They shared a long look, looking each other deeply in the eye. For the last time.

Eliza felt her mask begin to shatter and tears welled up in her eyes. She aggressively wiped the tears away, she wanted to see Alexander until the very last moment.

“I’m sorry,” Alexander said.

The wave of truth and reality hit Eliza. This really was the last time she could talk to her husband. She was unable to wipe the flood of tears from her eyes and buried her face in Alexander’s opened hand.

“I forgive you,” she said through her tears. She looked up at Alexander again. A heavy weight lay on her chest, but it seemed like one had been lifted from Alexander’s. Eliza wondered how she could ever forgive Alexander for not telling her he was leaving, but she did. She forgave him, because what else could she do for him? “I forgive you. I love you, Alexander, I forgive you.”

Alexander squeezed her hand weakly to indicate he was still there. His eyes were full of tears as well, and his face was relaxed.

“Remember, my Eliza, you are a Christian,” he muttered. Eliza moved closer to kiss him on the lips and Alexander closed his eyes.

-

In her mind Eliza screamed at Alexander. “ _Open your eyes! Tell me you love me! Hold me one last time! Stay alive_ …” Alexander didn’t. He weakly gasped for air. He didn’t move his hand anymore.

“I’m here, Alexander,” Eliza heard herself say over and over again. Alexander lay still. Eliza looked at her husband. “ _One breath. Give me one more breath…_ ”

He didn’t.

-

A heavy silence hung over the room like a veil. The people gathered held on to each other. Eliza held on to the hope that Alexander would let out one more breath.

“ _Don’t let this be the last one. One more, Alexander. Please._ ”

She examined his face. Was this Alexander?

People started leaving the room in silence. Eliza kept her eyes on her husband in case he would take another breath. Peggy sat down next to her and stroked her on the back. “Eliza,” she said softly. Eliza didn’t respond. Her sister kissed her on the cheek and left the room.

Eliza was alone in the room. “ _No, Alexander is here with me,_ ” she thought against her better judgement. “ _Come on, Alexander, come on!_ ” The man on the bed whose hand she was holding wasn’t Alexander anymore. He looked like him, but it wasn’t her husband.

_He was just here. He was just here! Where did he go?_

_… Alexander!_

_Why isn’t Alexander here?_

_When was the last time I saw him smile?_

Eliza screamed into the blanket and gave over to her sobs.

“Alexander, come back… You were just here…”

**Author's Note:**

> ...  
> Please let me know what you think :')


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